Mrw wrote:RW, this seems to be a continuation of another thread. What the original question here doesn't say is that the SM in question is also the boy's father. Walking away and joining somewhere else becomes not so easy.
JazerNorth wrote:Plus, when do you tell your boys to walk away from a challenge? That isn't teaching them how to become a man, instead it teaches them if things get hard, go find somthing else to do. Be tough and stick with the troop. Also, your Dad is going to drive you nuts, that is what Dads are for, so get over it.
If a Scout tells me he's dissatisfied with the Troop he's in, "my SM's a total butt-head", dad or not, I'd still give the kid the same advise. Two facts in point: I'm an ADC, instead of a UL (SM or ASM), to specifically give my son enough space to be a Scout, rather than the son of the SM. Don't get me wrong; I'm on my son's Troop's committee and attend some meetings and help out some, go on an occasional trip with the Troop. My son and I both chose the Troop he's in because there are enough active parent/leaders to spread the load. But, my point is, my son hasn't got a dad for a UL... to me, that usually starts out great... 11, 12, 13 y/o/ But, by the time the kid turns 14 or 15, the teenager wants (no, NEEDS) some time and space to get out from under dad's thumb. That's what makes Scouting so great. Positive, safe, adult role models both with and without the immediate family unit. We've had kids in our Troop whose parent(s) were active in other units. We've also had siblings in seperate units for the same reason.
And, leaving one Troop to join another is not running away from a challenge. If I hadn't done just that, at age 12, I would have been a quitter. But, instead, I was invited to join another Troop after leaving the one I quit. If it hadn't been for that, I'd have never had the wonderful opportunities I experianced as a Scout... '77 NSJ, Summer Camp, Summer Camp staff, O.A., Eagle, etc.
If a Scout is so unhappy that he wants to leave the Troop, it's almost NEVER the Scout who's the problem. It's the program (or lack thereof) or a personality conflict. Maybe Dad needs to step aside (i.e., ASM, MC) and let his son enjoy Scouting like the rest of the Scouts in his Troop. Maybe dad and son could set down and work out some compromise. Otherwise, IMHO, the Scout should ALWAYS be specifically given the opportunity of joining another unit.
confusedscout, You should really try, try really hard, to work out a compromise with your SM/dad. Having a dad who is an active leader in your unit can be the best of both worlds. Someday, you'll look back and REALLY appreciate the fact that your dad was there for you.... butt-head, or not. If you simply can't work with him, talk to him about this. But, make the decision TOGETHER. (Whenever I tell a kid to go shopping for another Troop to call home, it's a de facto requirement that he go sell the idea to his parents... Cuz, ultimately, they have to be sold on the move.)
by confusedscout » Sun Jan 29, 2006 6:27 pm