getting respect

[hacimsaalk]

tonight i got elected to the position of SPL ( not trying to brag or anything). i know from experience (as being an older scout in the troop) that scouts in my troop, both older and younger, do not respect authority or take orders ( commands, requests, w/e u want to call them) well. they argue, complain, and often will downright refuse to do the task at hand. ( more often than not, they will pass it off to a younger scout b/c they " have rank on them"). so, my question is- how can we get these scout to respect "boy leaders"? and take responsibility for what tasks they have been given?

All help will be appreciated,

Hacimsaalk

[cballman]

First off look back and see how you treated the older boys in the troop. when you treat others with respect then they will respect you. but if in the past your respect level for the older boys and adults was at a low level then you can expect the same for your term. now that you have been elected SPL congrats. it is a thankless position. but with a couple of ASPL then your job can be much fun. just remember when you have a problem dont scream and hollar at the kids but talk to them and explain to them what went wrong. use the scout sign to keep order. also make sure you have a meeting plan and follow it. if something happens then use plan B if that dont work use plan C if that dont work then maybe you need to sit down and plan more and better. now dont take this personal but just look at what went wrong with the last SPL or what you think that was wrong and then build on what he was doing but just remember also to use the scout book as a guide and dont come out and say that fred was doing a bad job and I will do better. dont put someone down because they dont see eye to eye with you but build a strong leadership core and use it wisely.

[evmori]

Charlie the Bear hit the nail on the head!

If you want respect from people, you have to respect them. too.

Remember, respect is earned.

[Chief J]

Congratulations on being elected SPL. Now a little about respect. You cannot order someone to respect you. Respect is earned. Also to earn respect you have to show respect.

From your post, it sounds like you will have your work cut out for you. Make sure you have a meeting plan or schedule for everything you do. Ensure that Scouts know what role they will have in that meeting. If you ask an older Scout to do something for you, follow up and ensure it is done. Seek input from the PLC on what they would like to do to keep meetings interesting. If the older Scouts will not follow your plan and continue to be disruptive, talk with them one on one and explain what you are trying to accomplish and that you do not appreciate the interference. If they continue to interfere and will not get on board, then you have to ask them why they are in Scouts.

Good Luck,
Chief J

[WVBeaver05]

As most all the previous responders have pointed out -- you have to give respect before you get it. However, it isn't that simple. First, there can be a significant lag between when you start giving it and when you start getting it back. Second, there is no way to be sure that everyone will return respect to you.

Keeping all this in mind, I would suggest (at the risk of sounding like a broken record -- for all you youngsters, that mean repeating myself ) that training is in order. Your SM should be going over the responsibilities and expectations for all positions of responsibility. That should be a clue to the other youth leaders.

I think it would be valuable to suggest a Troop level Junior Leader Training day to your SM. You can / should help him plan, prepare, and execute it. You should get something out of, but in this case the best thing that can happen is if the other Youth Leaders get something out of it.

Most of all, try not to get discouraged. It can take quite a while to make a change of this type.

YiS

[616kayak]

There will be some times where some one gives you a problem here are some guidelines for dealing with it.

1) If you need to have a conversation with some one about their behavior have this conversation alone. Be sure not to do this in front of the rest of the troop because then there are more followers than leaders. By having the conversation alone it is a one on one and therefore easier to control the outcome. Having a specific location outside the meeting room will help too.

2) If you have already called signs up for the same group talking then I would suggest after the third signs up you say something along the lines of “Johnny please don’t interrupt the meeting the rest of the troop is having trouble paying attention.” When you address some one by name you are making it more personal to them and having more of an impact.

3) If some one gives you too much trouble you may need some one else to handle the situation. At that point an adult leader can usually help.

4) Keep everything you do constant. If you say that there will be a consequence for something then follow through on what you said. If you are not willing to do it then don’t say you will.


“You may live in your house but are you a part of your house?”

Take this position and do the most you can with it. Be part of the position. Spend time thinking about how you can improve the way you do your job.

------edit----------
you may want to update your sig

[hacimsaalk]

4) Keep everything you do constant. If you say that there will be a consequence for something then follow through on what you said. If you are not willing to do it then don’t say you will.

what kind of consequenses can we really install in scouting? this is one place that our troop lacks. could anyone help me out here ?

[Mrw]

Things like "If you don't bring the campout fee to the meeting before, you can't go this time," or "We are leaving for the campout promptly at 6:00 PM. If you are late, you need to have your parents bring you out as we will not wait."

And follow through. Leave on time. Set the camp roster by who paid on time. They will learn pretty quickly.

We had a boy who used to call me to pick him up to get to campouts on time since his mom was always late for everything. He got left once and his stepfather wouldn't take him to the camp. It made him understand the importance of punctuality, got him better organized personally since mom was not capable of helping with that, made him more responsible for himself and his activities. And the troop was no longer waiting for stragglers that put everything off schedule.

[vpalango]

We've actually had some behavior problems at times at troop meetings... The PLC, as a result, agreed on troop rules of behavior. If you violate them, you are given a warning, if you violate them again, your parents are asked to pick you up.

If you fall below 50% attendance, you aren't eligible for the next campout, and obviously someone who has difficulty with this will be having a conversation with me about scout spirit.

YIS,

[Lynda J]

Remember you are not a Drill Sergent. You don't bark orders.
Worked with a wonderful teacher years ago. She never raised her voice in class. She would announce a field trip several weeks after school started. She didn't make a big deal about it. Just made the announcement every day. On the day of the trip she made sure she had a sub teacher to cover the kids that hadn't listened. The kids that didn't have they lunch, permission slip. Were not allowed on the trip. They complained but she stood her ground. After that when she started talking in her calm quite voice you could hear a pen drop in that class room and everyone was looking straight at her.

But like others have already said. If you want the boys to respect you then you will have to show them respect.