by aflmom » Tue May 20, 2008 8:19 pm
Here's hoping the formatting came out decent!
May 20, 2007
Reference Letter: Andrew -------
To: Eagle Scout Board of Review
As Andrew’s parents, we know Andrew more intimately than any other person. His road to Eagle has not been an easy one. In fact, it has been filled with adversity. On numerous occasions we wanted Andrew to withdraw from the troop, but he preserved in spite of the lack of support. The following are examples of his determination not to quit.
When Andrew first started scouts in 2004, he commented that it was one of the few times where he felt accepted in a group setting. He felt like the troop was an extended family, and that it was a safe environment where he could be himself. He felt it was okay to make mistakes, learn from them, and move on. However, that didn’t last long.
Although he set goals to obtain merit badges and advance through the ranks, he had problems finding merit badge counselors, and no one was available to walk him through the process. His first merit badge was obtained in Tampa at a USF Engineer camp. He continued to look for opportunities to obtain merit badges and advance through the ranks. Even advancement did not come easily. He had problems scheduling times with a counselor to get checked off. He was discouraged from advancing and told he needed to slow down.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
One of the few highlights of his scouting experience was when Gail ----- asked him to help teach some of the badges and said she wanted to use his notebooks as an example. Because of her untimely and unfortunate death, that never materialized. However, he continued to move forward in working toward his goals.
Again, leaders in the troop told him he needed to slow down. They were concerned about other scouts and how they would feel with someone younger being a higher rank. In response, he shared he was going to college and wanted to work on his badges and eagle rank before school and his schedule became more difficult. Subsequently, three leaders met with Andrew and grilled him for almost 1 1/2 hours. He was exhausted when he came home and started crying. Basically, it boiled down to the following concerns:
1. Maturity to be an Eagle Scout
2. Social skills
3. Other scouts having a problem due to his age
4. Being a paper scout
5. Possibly not passing the Board of Review and looking bad for the troop.
Some of the things addressed included not rushing through scouts, enjoying the experience of scouting, having fun, making a fatal error and having to start all over again. At one point, one of the leaders thought the meeting was over and left and then came back and asked Andrew, "Are they still beating on you?"
When Andrew came home he told me that it was difficult to keep his face impassive because on the inside he was really upset. He didn't want his face to reflect his feelings, so he found a spot inside of his mouth and held his tongue against it to keep his face from moving and possibly grimacing or being disrespectful.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
As time went on, expectations were raised for Andrew. He commented once that when he went to scouts, he just wanted to be a kid. He didn’t want to be treated as a college student or have higher expectations placed on him.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
Andrew started working on his eagle project in 2005. During that year he spoke with two different organizations and began the preliminary planning and write-up of his project. Although both organizations expressed interest in the project, neither one followed up. With much reluctance, and after speaking with a professor about the problem, he decided to move on.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
Andrew’s last attempt with an eagle project was also fraught with adversity. He was given verbal permission to go ahead with the project only for it to create problems later. When the project was completed in December, he was told he had to change the dates of the volunteers and get another date from the sponsoring organization. He was told he had to take diagrams and receipts out his project book.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
In January his project was once again completed with the change in dates. He was told everything was being taken care of. In March, he still hadn’t heard back and kept attempting to follow up.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
In April, Andrew received a phone call and was yelled at because of people I had been contacting. His eagle board of review was scheduled for May 15. A week before the EBOR, Andrew received a call stating he needed references. The application said to list the names of people that would be willing to give a reference. It didn’t say to ask or contact the people for a reference. His EBOR was rescheduled without asking him if the date and time were convenient or if he had prior commitments.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
Finally, the day drew closer for his EBOR. Two days before the scheduled event, he received yet another phone call asking if he had reference letters. In addition, he was told his parents needed to write one.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
The scouting experience and the trail to Eagle has not been an enjoyable one. It’s been stressful; it’s involved a lot of work, and there’s been a lot of conflict. Unfortunately, it became another ‘chore’ to be completed.
In spite of the above, Andrew persevered.
